Well, here I am 6 days into a minimum of a 7 day stay in hospital, and this is the first chance I have had to sit down with the laptop to start on my blog entries. I have so much to write that it is going to take a while to catch up but I am sure I can do it. (I am home now).
I have done a few videos and taken loads of pictures and I have decided to write about what has happened in the last few days, in chapters.
I always said I would like to have 2 children by the time I was 30 and that's exactly what I got, to the day!
Chapter one – Labour & Delivery
After my last post, I went on the computer briefly and Nic recommended a contraction counter which we put onto Rob's iPhone. The contractions were still very brief and irregular but they were definitely there.
I went for a lie down but had to keep waking up to monitor the contractions. They seemed to step up a bit while I was laid down so I got back up and went downstairs.
I laid across my ball just counting the contractions and ended up phoning the birthing suite to see what they suggested as they didn't seem to be progressing and I had been contracting for a while now. I also mentioned that I hadn't felt Dollop move for a couple of hours. They weren't overly concerned.
They suggested that I come in to have a check and to be monitored for a bit. I told Rob to call Dave and I called my Dad to let him know what was going on.
While Dave was on his way, we got everything ready and pretty much left as soon as he arrived. I ran through a few things with him and wrote some phone numbers etc. Told him we would be about an hour or so. It wasn't rushed or stressful which is what I had envisaged for weeks now.
The car was packed and we were off. I took one last glance at the house thinking that the next time I come home, my baby would be out of my tummy and we would have a new addition to our family. I wasn't worried about Ellis which was great and I was coping fine with the contractions which were only lasting about 40 seconds.
The car journey took a lot longer than I thought it would and I was pleased that Rob went the route that I wanted to go. I had 3 contractions in the car which were horrid. I remember saying to Rob that I was glad that I wasn't in full labour on the car journey. Little did we know.
We arrived, parked up and grabbed a few things. I was still sure we would be sent home so told Rob to leave a lot of the stuff in the car for later. I then waddled down through the car park to the delivery suite reception, where a young man was on his mobile phone. Rob said he had spent a long time stood in the same spot calling people after Ellis had arrived. I looked at the man and I said to Rob, “look at him, he's glowing!” A beaming new Daddy spreading his happy news. You can tell that I am really not concentrating on what is going on with me. Still in denial!
We checked in around 10:30pm, cleaned our hands and walked through to another reception. There was a short delay as they tried to find me a room but we were eventually shown into room 3 where I started to pace around, trying to remain active.
I was put on the bed, blood pressure taken, which was slightly high, wee sample given, loads of questions asked etc and still the contractions were very spread apart and not all that bad really. I couldn't talk through them but the peak of the contraction didn't last too long at this stage and the gap between them was rather large, about 6-8 minutes.
My midwife, Vera, found a mobile monitor that had had a fault reported on it of humming but it didn't seem to make too much noise. It was the biggest fiasco of the whole process of giving birth. It was put on and I was monitored for a while.
I then had the first internal. I was 5 cms! Half way already! Only another, on average, 5 hours to go which was pretty much spot on.
I was allowed off the bed and I tried to lean on my ball, on the floor on a mat. Rob had to get the ball first though. It was useless as every time I rocked, the monitor slipped and they came and fussed with it, mid contraction too. Not very easy to stay focused.
I tried pacing around and leaning over the counter but still they fussed me with the monitor. I was also back and forth to the toilet a lot too. I was really cold so I put on my pink fluffy socks like I had done when I was in labour with Ellis.
Eventually I was told that they may have to change to a different monitor and by this stage I was almost at the point of asking for it.
Bev, a rather overbearing Delivery Suite Supervisor came in to put my cannula in. I had scared my midwife by telling her that it took 5 attempts with Ellis because my veins collapse. Bev wasn't put off by such news but as soon as she put it in, I had a golf ball size swelling on my arm. “Oh!” she said, sounding obviously surprised that I was right and she was wrong, “that doesn't normally happen.” After a bit of prodding the swelling went down but I knew I was in for a huge bruise in the next couple of days. The other stupid thing was that she put it in on my wrist joint so I couldn't bend my wrist! I had asked for it to be put somewhere where I could still be active on my hands. Another thing that was getting on my nerves. I protested a lot about the cannula as it was stinging and was causing me a lot of distraction. Probably a good thing really. I was called a brave lady though as I didn't flinch when she put it in. To be fair she was actually quite good at putting it in but my veins just don't like them.
Bev was called in a few times as Dollop's heart rate was rather high, and Vera wanted a second opinion. They mentioned a couple of times that they may call the doctor up to have a quick look but it never came to that. Eventually I was asked to lie down to get some rest. I think this was their way of saying we need to monitor you and your moving around is hindering that.
I didn't really mind lying down by now as I was starting to feel really tired. The contractions were nothing like when I had them with Ellis so I didn't even think I was in active labour – I'm so stupid at times even with all this knowledge.
I laid down on my left hand side and the heart rate was still slightly high. They asked me to turn over to my other side, which was actually very, very comfortable. I have been sleeping on my left side for months because of optimal foetal positioning but it has actually been very uncomfortable. I have been dying to lie on my right which felt much better. As you can see in the pictures I was covered in blankets as I was feeling really cold and couldn't stop shaking. This was not helping me to relax.
Pretty much as soon as I turned over, Dollop's heart rate dropped down to normal levels and my contractions kicked up a gear. I spent the next few hours on my right hand side, breathing through the ever increasing contractions. Dollop was obviously happy with me in this position and so my body responded by progressing the labour. I dealt with the pain by using my TENS machine on boost and just saying in my head in for 4 out for 6. I tried to visualise my body opening up and a little baby moving down and out. I let the pain/sensation wash over me and relaxed as much as I possibly could. My body was doing the work, I just had to help it out with sorting out my head, which I think I did really well.
I sipped water in between contractions and squeezed Rob's hand at the peak. It was very hard at times to maintain the concentration. Mainly because Rob and the midwife were exchanging chit-chat and Bev kept sticking her oar in. Also the cannula was stinging and I was aware that I wasn't doing what I have been taught to do, stay active, on your feet, walk around etc. The only things that were keeping me laid down were that the labour had progressed faster and that I didn't want to walk around. They say to listen to your body and I did. I didn't feel this need to walk and wiggle, being settled was working for me. This to me was being active and not passive.
Rob had noticed in my notes that the midwife had written “coping well with contractions using entinox.” Rob quickly pointed out that I was in fact only using a TENS machine. She apologised and said that it was because she was just so used to writing it.
I was examined again at about 3:15am and I was 9cm. I can't believe how easy it seemed up until this point. The midwife pointed out that I hadn't even listened to my music yet and I said that I was saving it for the next level up of pain.
Lots of things happened that, looking back on them, made me realise that I may well have been in transition. It wasn't a defined stage but things definitely changed just before the midwife said I was 10cm and ready to try pushing. I started to moo during the contractions as I felt like they were consuming me. The mooing sound was brilliant and it vibrated down through my body and made me feel much more relaxed. After 2 contractions of mooing I asked Rob if I was making too much noise, to which he replied “No, you're doing really well.” I also started to say to Rob that I was scared and that I didn't like it. Just before I was checked, too, I had a contraction that made me start to lift my head up and I realised this straight away and tucked my chin down instead.
At 4:20am Vera said I was 10cm and that the entire cervix had gone. Before I changed position for pushing, Rob and the midwife sat me on a bowl, on a chair for me to try and empty my bladder but I just couldn't go. I had said I wanted to push while up on my knees so I moved into this position leaning against the back of the bed. I wanted to rest my head on my arm but my stinging cannula made that impossible. So I held Rob's hand and lent on that instead.
I really didn't need to push and I didn't have any feeling of a pushing sensation. The contraction came and went with me making a very feeble attempt of pushing. I was pushing from my stomach and it didn't do anything. I kept apologising for not doing it right. The next one came and I pushed really, really hard right in my bum like I was doing a huge poo and that seemed to feel right. I could feel that I was pushing against the baby. But it did also make me poo. I’m not ashamed to admit it, it’s just a part of labour and most women do it. I didn’t even care at the time, in fact I think Rob and I had a laugh about it.
My waters still hadn’t gone and I was really worried about them going with a big bang, and my legs getting covered with fluid. This didn’t happen and in fact, I pushed out my bag of waters so that it was hanging down in-between my legs still intact. It was a strange feeling but I was still scared that they were going to pop and that the contractions would increase considerably and I wouldn’t be able to cope anymore. Thankfully they just ended up trickling out instead, and I didn’t even notice as the midwife cleaned it up as we went. Apparently it is very good luck for the waters to stay intact.
I continued to push in this position for a while but things weren't progressing very well, so again I laid down on my left hand side with my right leg in the air, supported by Rob as I kept getting cramp in it. At one point I let a contraction pass without pushing and the midwife noticed. I tried to tell her that I didn't need to push but she didn't seem bothered.
Bev decided to make yet another appearance, mid contraction with my legs akimbo, saying "good girl, your doing really well". If I could have reached something to throw at her, I would have.
Pushing is extremely hard work. It wasn’t painful but just physically exhausting. I was now sweating, instead of shivering with the cold. The midwife asks you to do 3 pushes per contraction, taking a deep breath in-between each push. My contractions weren’t lasting that long so I struggled to fit 3 good pushes in each time. It did take some practice to get it right, pushing while holding your breath, maintain the pressure down below as you take another deep breath to push again. You need to maintain the pressure or the baby just slips back up again.
At a certain point I reached down and felt the very top of his head as I wanted to make sure that Vera wasn’t lying to me and that I was actually making some progress. Rob was really good too. I could tell he was excited, surprised, happy, proud and more, all at the same time. He was really good at just encouraging me, not telling me what to do. He didn’t say push, he didn’t tell me to come on, he just said I was doing really well and he promised me that he could see the head and that it was coming closer.
After what seemed like forever, things were starting to sting a little down below. I knew this was a good sign that things were stretching ready for the crowning. I tried to push steady and slowly but very hard. Sounds contradictory but you can do it. The stinging got worse but I continued to push with all my might but tried really hard to relax all my muscles as I knew it would be better for me.
I would have to say that the next bit was the hardest part. The stinging was now more than that and I knew that this was it. The head was going to come out. I so wanted it out but at the same time was a bit scared to push through the pain. All the information I had received in my active birthing classes just kicked in and I listened to the midwife, pushed hard and tried to relax through the pain as much as possible. I knew it wasn’t going to last forever. Vera told me to pant and I did loads, then it was small push, pant, small push and it was out! The relief! Yes it hurt like hell but for only a short period of time and I was just happy that all the pushing would soon be over as I was shattered. I slowly put my hand down and felt his head. The midwife said well done as earlier I was a bit scared and said, “no I don’t want to”.
At this point Rob grabbed the camcorder and started to video. I remember thinking, you’re not allowed to do that but I didn’t say anything as I was just too tired. I won’t post the video on here for obvious reasons but I have to say that I am so pleased that Rob did pick it up when he did. It has been amazing and emotional to watch it back. You are so caught up in the moment that you forget and miss so much.
So here I am with my baby’s head sticking out. I’m sweating, exhausted, relieved, excited, and so much more, waiting for another contraction. I was moved a bit and I ended up more on my back then I ever expected to be but it worked so I’m not going to complain. I did another push and I felt that the midwife was pulling on the head upwards, and then the arm popped out and she told me to put my hands down and to pull him up myself. I reached down and grabbed him under the arms, thinking he was already out, and pulled him up towards me. Little did I know that Dollop was only out from the chest up! I immediately cuddled him and he was wrapped up in a blanket. The midwife said congratulations and she was crying.
The relief that it was over was immense, but the pride and sense of achievement I felt far outweighed any tiredness, aches or pains. I had done it! I had my natural birth and I had coped every step of the way. The midwife even said to me, “you would have thought she’d had an epidural!”
I really wanted to have immediate skin on skin contact but I was still wearing my t-shirt, bra and TENS machine. I ripped the TENS off and tried to get my clothes off but it was very difficult in the position I was in.
The cord was allowed to stop pulsing so that Dollop could receive all the best blood from it and it was clamped and cut by Rob, being caught on the camcorder too, which was great.
The next job was getting the placenta out. I had opted for a natural delivery of the placenta which can take up to an hour but after 3 minutes of fretting the midwife said she wanted to give me the injection. I had tried a few pushes to get it out but it wasn't moving. To be honest I was so tired, the thought of having to do more pushing was out of the question for me. The injection was a shock in the thigh and if I had known a bit more about 3rd stage of labour, I would have kept my TENS machine on! After some more pushing and pulling the midwife put a catheter in to drain my bladder which was very full. This seemed to help but it wasn't very nice.
I was still getting mild contractions and the midwife was pressing on my now jelly belly and pulling on the cord and when it finally came out, it felt much bigger than I had anticipated. It actually hurt. The whole thing caught me by surprise and I wished I was a bit more prepared.
I asked if I had torn during the crowning and 2 midwives had a look. There was a small L- shaped tear on one side that could either have 1 stitch or be left to heal on it's own. The thought of being poked, prodded, stabbed, pricked etc down there was a no go, so I was happy to leave it for the time being. Both midwives agreed they would do the same if it was them.
The midwife was now happy, and after a bit of cleaning up, checking of blood pressure, temperature, pulse, paperwork etc, she left us on our own to get to know our new little bundle.
I was eventually able to get up out of bed and made it to the bathroom for a bath. Rob stayed and dressed Leo and then came to join me. It was so nice to have a soak in the bath and to get clean. Rob mentioned my face during the pushing stage. He said he had never seen anyone's face go so red. He pointed to a red chair next to me and said it was redder than that! He said he could tell how hard I was trying and the evidence was still there to be seen as I had burst tons and tons of blood vessels on my face, chest and shoulders. I had a look in the mirror and I hardly recognised myself. It was like my face was covered in loads of freckles. The midwife said she thought I looked like that before! How could she not see the difference!
Back in our room, the sun had come up and the birds were singing. I gave Dollop his first proper feed which he did really well with, and then after Rob had had a second cuddle I told him to try and get some rest while I sat chilling, eating and drinking, looking at my boys.
Dollop was checked over and the paperwork was done followed by some tea and toast as I was so hungry! I was allowed to eat at the start of the labour but when Dollop's heart rate changed, they said I couldn't have any more just in case I had to go into the operating theatre.
I was soon in a wheelchair being pushed down to the Percy Phillips ward, room 5 bed 2, (later changed to bed 4).
Chapter 2 will commence from entering the ward. Phew, loads to go!
Bye 2020
-
New year, new blog post. I have so much I could write about that has
happened over the last few months but I'm not sure this is the best place
to put it...
4 years ago
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